When Pennsylvania Meets Transylvania

"howdy, y'all!" cardigan greeted the regulars in the Pub as he entered. "what's on the menu tonight, danny?"

"brat, beer, and cheese soup with burkie's no-knead sourdough bread," the man behind the bar replied as he poured a Bass ale for his latest customer.

"food of the gods, that's what that is," cardigan noted as he took a sip from his beer and walked over to join the others.

"gavin, look who's here!" marian elfman waved him over to their table.

"oh, hello mr. franklin," cardigan greeted their colonial friend. "happy new year."

"thank you, sir, and happy new--NO! get him, damn it!" benjamin franklin slammed his beer mug to the table and yelled at the television.

cardigan glanced upward to see darren sproles of the san diego chargers return a kick-off deep into pittsburgh steeler territory. "are you a steelers fan, mr. franklin?"

"i am loyal to the state of pennsylvania, my good man. i hope you saw my philadelphia eagles
open up a can of whoop-ass on the hated new york giants earlier!" he hesitated, his bald pate blushing slightly. "i'm sorry if i'm being insensitive. is new york your home town?"

danny blake dropped off cardigan's dinner and shrugged his shoulders. "we have no idea. burkie hasn't told us where we're located yet."

cardigan scoffed. "i think you give burkie too much credit. he probably hasn't told us because he hasn't figured it out himself yet." he tasted the soup. "have to give him credit, though. he keeps us well-fed."

"here you go, mr. franklin. an early birthday present for you," Mysterious Lurker suddenly appeared, handing the founding father a green and silver foam philadelphia eagles hat.

"why, thank you, young lady. i shall wear it with pride!" he placed the ridiculous hat on his head. "tommy jefferson will have a cow when he sees this," he chuckled.

"no!" judge st. bishop stormed in. "you cannot take NFL headgear back to the 18th Century! burkie, put a stop to this now, i demand it!" he picked up a slice of cardigan's bread and begins to gnaw on it. "hey, this is good. danny, can we have more bread over here?"

"of course, it would be better if they were the philadelphia beavers," mr. franklin mused, recalling the conversation that brought them all together for the first time.

"did you play any sports, mr. franklin?" sierra charles asked.

"no, i was more studious than athletic, to tell you the truth. but i'm anxious to try snowboarding. i seem to have a knack for it based on this Wii thing," he gestured toward the game console.

the judge looked alarmed. "you haven't been playing video games with him, have you?!"

"why not?" taylor argued. "we wouldn't have video games if not for electricity. we're showing him how valuable his contributions have been."

"and he's smart enough to use anything he learns in our time responsibly," sierra stated. "he's benjamin franklin! he's smarter than all of us put together."

"you are very kind, my dear," mr. franklin beamed at her. "say, do you think i could bring somebody with me next time? i have an apprentice printer who is about your age, and i think you two would be very compatible."

marian snickered as sierra stammered. "uh, that's not necessary, mr. franklin. please, uh, that would only make the judge here even more upset."

judge st. bishop nodded as he chewed.

mr. franklin nodded. "perhaps it's just as well. he doesn't need any additional distractions. the scroundrel printed a page of the Almanack upside-down last week."

"that's okay, mr. franklin. i met a guy the other day for sierra. i told him to meet us here tonight, and he should be here any minute," taylor announced, his fangs appearing as he grinned.

"what?!" sierra did her best to glare at taylor while hurriedly digging through marian's purse to borrow her mirror.

"where did you meet somebody, taylor? you never go anywhere," marian looked suspicious.

taylor looked sheepish even as he took a long sip from his mug. "i met him in a vampire chat room," he admitted.

"i'm out of here!" sierra grabbed her coat and ran out the door.

marian slugged taylor on the arm.

"ow! what'd you do that for? you thought it was funny when mr. franklin tried to set her up." taylor looked puzzled.

"plus, sierra is the one who used to be fascinated with vampires," cardigan recollected.

"and don't forget when she said this," taylor pointed out in his defense.

marian shook her head. "boys."

just then a tall, handsome man entered the pub. "excuse me, is there a sierra charles here? my name is angel and i was supposed to meet her here."

taylor shook his head. "sorry, dude. she freaked out when i told her and ran out."

angel sighed. "story of my life." he turned around and left.

marian slugged taylor on the arm again.

"ow! what'd you do that for?"

"you let him get away!"

taylor looked bewildered. "but she wasn't interested! and you said i shouldn't've done it in the first place!" he rubbed his arm, cursing under his breath.

blake walked over and handed taylor another beer. "just let it go, taylor."

"boys," marian muttered.