CYA: The Judge & The ChronoGuard Go Their Own Way

NOTE: if you did not jump to this chapter as a result of the Choose Your Adventure story, please go here before reading any further!


gavin shook his head. "no, we still need to find mr. franklin--" he glanced at ChronoGuard Ben and added, "the other mr. franklin. you guys go that way; we'll go this way."

they wished each other luck, then the judge & ChronoGuard Ben walked down the hall to the right, rounded the corner, and found themselves face-to-face with ben franklin!

"mr. franklin, we finally found you!"

ChronoGuard Ben shook his head. "that's not colonial me, your honor. that's a more senior me in the ChronoGuard.

"not exactly true," the new ben franklin said. "i'm a possible you that could be, if certain things go a certain way."

"i hate time travel," the judge murmured.

"i am happy to hear that," said the possible ben franklin that could be.

"why is that?" the judge asked in confusion.

"because you're gonna love this!" the possible ben franklin that could be replied with a maniacal laugh, taking out a gadget and pressing a button.

suddenly, the judge & ChronoGuard Ben were zapped into another dimension where they are standing in a cashier line. they are each holding a six pack of Schlitz, and there are four other customers in front of them. they heard the voice of the possible ben franklin that could be over the loud speaker.

"welcome to a customized time loop! i have taken great pains to make it very special for you. after all, it will be your home for eternity, bwah ha ha!"

"i don't like the sound of that," the judge whispered to ChronoGuard Ben. "what does he mean?"

ChronoGuard Ben sighed heavily as customer currently at the cashier emptied a bag of pennies onto the counter and started counting them out to pay for his beer. "it means that we are going to stand in line to buy this crappy beer. and, unless i have totally misread the evil possible me that could be, as soon as we get to the front of the line, we will start to re-live the entire episode again. and again. and again. forever and ever. that's what a time loop is, and there is no escape."

the judge looked alarmed as the customer directly in front of them was practicing phrases from The English Survival Guide for Vietnamese Travelers. "don't tell me that. do not tell me that!"

"i'm sorry, my friend, but it's true" ChronoGuard Ben told him, trying to mask his own frustration as the next customer in line began to argue that the sign in front of his beer said "Sale!"

"i can't take this--let's get out of here!" the judge tried to step out of line but couldn't.

"we can't," ChronoGuard Ben told him. "we have no choice but to play out the script that has been written."

the current customer was regaling the cashier with a litany of every ailment she had ever had, real or imagined.

"over, and over, and over again for eternity."

a vein was visibly throbbing in the judge's forehead. "why did the evil possible you that could be do this to you?"

ChronoGuard Ben shrugged his shoulders. "as i wrote in Poor Richard's Almanac, power corrupts, and absolute power corrupts absolutely. the ability to manipulate time definitely qualifies as absolute power."

"you didn't coin that phrase; Lord Acton did, in 1887," the judge pointed out.

"the point is," ChronoGuard Ben emphasized, "the possible me that could be has become drunk on power and wants to rule not only the world, but time as well."

the vietnamese customer finally croaked out a "thank you" and, as they stepped forward in line, they found four other customers in front of them. they heard the voice of the possible ben franklin that could be over the loud speaker.

"welcome to a customized time loop! i have taken great pains to make it very special for you. after all, it will be your home for eternity, bwah ha ha!"

the judge looked at ChronoGuard Ben in agony. "can we kill ourselves? or each other?"

"i wish."


THE END
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Dear Reader,

You have reached the end of your adventure. I hope you enjoyed it! If not, well, you only have yourself to blame because, you know, you chose it yourself. Also, since you--not I--chose this adventure, it did not really take place in the Burkieverse and, therefore, will not have any continuity with the regular Poor Yorick's Pub chapters. Thanks for playing and, if you're in the mood to try another adventure, go back to the beginning and choose a different path!