"howdy, danny boy!" gavin cardigan entered Poor Yorick's Pub and greeted the owner. "what's for supper?"
"cajun chicken pasta," danny blake replied from behind the bar, pouring an ale for his friend.
"thank you, sir," cardigan bowed. "it is an honor to dine here."
he took his ale over to join the others. "what's up, everyone?"
"hi, cardigan," sierra charles greeted him. "we were just discussing marian's latest column."
"did you get a good question?" cardigan asked marian elfman, author of the syndicated advice column "Don't Be So Melodramatic!"
"no," marian pouted. "i haven't gotten any really good questions in a long time. i may have to resort to making up my own questions."
"isn't that unethical?" linda nulo asked.
"no, not really. in fact, if it's a question that somebody is likely struggling with but is too embarrassed to ask for help, it's actually kind of a public service."
"uh-huh." cardigan sounded skeptical.
"i'm going to check my email. maybe there's a good question there." marian's fingers clicked and clacked over the keyboard of her laptop, then paused. "oh, i have an email from benjamin franklin!"
"our benjamin franklin?" judge st. bishop stormed in at that moment. "he's using email now?"
"OMG!" marian shrieked. "listen!"
Dear Marian,
I hope this electronic letter finds you well. This iPhone gadget is quite extraordinary! At any rate, I'm excited to inform you that I've made a breakthrough in my research into building a device for traveling through time! I'm talking about purposeful, controlled time travel, not randomingly popping up in somebody's Pub based on the whims of a no-talent blogger. I am about to embark on my first journey. Wish me luck! I'm going to Boston, Massuchessets on March 10, 1876 to witness Alexander Graham Bell as he introduces the first telephone. Honestly, the only thing he could think of to say is "Mr. Watson, come here, I want you?!" The man has no sense of the moment!
The point of my letter, however, is to let you know my intentions. If you do not receive another electronic letter from me in 1 hour, then I fear my experiment may have gone awry and I may need assistance. I feel certain that that should not prove necessary, however, and I look forward to sharing my story with you.
Your friend,
Benjamin Franklin
"he sent this 3 hours ago and there's no follow-up! we have to save him, gavin!"
"i knew something like this would happen!" the judge grumbled, shaking his fist. "damn you, burkie!"
"how are we going to save him?" danny asked as he walked over to deliver cardigan's pasta. "we don't have a time machine."
"no, we don't. but h.g. wells invented one and it's in a museum right here in san francisco," cardigan pointed out. "according to the movie Time After Time, that is. we'll just go use that to go find mr. franklin."
"you do that," the Lurker said with a shake of her head. "i just saw the movie Hot Tub Time Machine and if i'm going to travel through time, i'd rather do it in a hot tub."
"not me," linda was shaking her head. "i'm going for the delorean in Back To The Future!"
"pardon me," a handsome man who looked a lot like eric bana walked in. "perhaps i can be of assistance? my name is henry detamble and i am chrono-impaired, which means i can travel through time."
"i'm with him!" sierra jumped up and went to him. "i'm sierra. this won't make me sick, will it?"
"well, no," detamble looked embarrassed. "but--"
"then let's go!"
the judge's thumbs were in overdrive sending a text message. "you guys go ahead. i'm contacting the ChronoGuard from jasper fforde's thursday next series. they respect the principles underlying time travel and understand the consequences of getting it wrong."
"listen, love." taylor elbowed marian, earning a scowl. "we should call up hermione granger from the Harry Potter series and use her time turner necklace thingie."
"do you know hermione granger?"
"yes. she interviewed me last year while doing research on vampires."
"you never told me that!" marian stomped her foot, scowling even more fiercely at taylor. "i want to meet hermione!"
the door burst open then and they turned to see foxy & julius/juliet charles rushing in. "we want to help!"
"foxy!" cardigan greeted her happily. "you guys can come with me. i'm planning to use h.g. wells' time machine to rescue mr. franklin."
"no, man. let's use the sonic transducer!" juliet stated excitedly.
"what's that?"
"it's the audio-vibratory physio-molecular transport device used by dr. frank-n-furter in the Rocky Horror Picture Show," juliet explained.
"but it was used to transport matter through space," the judge noted with a frown. "dr. everett scott only speculated that it could transport matter through time as well."
"it's time we found out, then," said juliet. "who's with me?"
gavin nodded. "right, i think time travel is too tricky for us to rely on just one method, but none of us should go alone."
"i'm going with henry," sierra stated defiantly, looking up at her traveling companion and adding a silent "woof!"
"taylor and i will go with hermione," marian said, looking both excited and anxious.
"ava!" the Lurker called, and burkie's friend ava reinier popped up. "we're going to time travel through a hot tub to find mr. franklin. get your swimsuit!"
"yay!"
"tucker, are you going with linda?"
tucker shook his head. "no, i'm prone to motion sickness. i'll think i'd better hang back here, in case mr. franklin shows up on his own."
"i'll go with linda," sgt. tarboom "boom-boom" shakalaka announced as she walked in. "i'll drive."
"like hell you will. it was my idea!"
boom-boom met linda's gaze and nodded. "fair enough."
"i won't be alone," the judge pointed out. "i'll be with a time travel professional from the ChronoGuard."
gavin nodded and looked around the room. "okay, so everybody has a partner except for juliet. who--"
"don't worry, everybody. i'm here to help!" heads turned and eyes rolled as dat rhaymes (AKA the black darter) strutted in, a blow gun strapped across his back. he bowed and kissed juliet's hand. "i'll protect you, m'lady."
juliet exchanged a look with sierra. "is he for real?"
sierra sighed. "dat, this is my brother juliet. juliet, dat is a vigilante who calls himself the black darter."
"well, aren't we the dressed-up pair!"
"all right, teams. let's go find mr. franklin!"
and now, a public service announcement from burkie:
dear readers, welcome to the Pub's first interactive adventure. that's right, you get to choose whose adventure you want to read. click on the link of your choice below to go to your next chapter.
gavin & foxy in the h.g. wells time machine
Mysterious Lurker and burkie's friend ava in the hot tub time machine
3 comments:
that was fun! i want more!!!
more?
MORE?!
that was 55 chapters, woman!
HOLY ALPHABET SOUP BATMAN!!
THAT WAS FUN !!!!
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